We are not talking about grape vines or vineyards here, for we are back in Mexico. After four years of living in this apartment, I decided what I really needed was some sort of a vine to trail along the wrought iron railing on my terrace. I have the "jungle" vine that comes up from three stories below that I train across the beam that supports my cabana. I love the look, but it dies back each year so I have to cut it back and wait for the summer rains for it to sprout again. I did not know what kind of vine to buy, but I wanted something that would remain green all year, and preferable have some sort of flowers.
I already had two smaller pots left over from some replanting a did a few months ago. I really did not want to buy new pots. The large plastic ones are 175 pesos a piece (for a 30 peso plant). You can buy the hand made clay pots for less, but they are too heavy for me, They also deteriorate after a few years because they are not fired, they are sun baked. So I used the two smaller pots. I did tell you that I am cheap (well when you try to live on $2,000 a month, you have to be frugal). Once potted they immediately sprang forth and began to twine around the wrought iron. Perfect! I thought, so now I wanted to get rid of the bougainvillea. Filipe said he would like them for their balcony. I told him they were extremely heavy especially after all the rain we have had. I told him to wait until we went a couple of days with not rain. Once we had a few dry days, he called and said he would like to pick them up. I was shocked when I saw he was alone with only his wife and little boy with him. I told him he would need more help. No! he could do it alone. He grabbed the plant my the trunk with one hand and held the bottom of the pot with the other. Mind you these plants are full of sharp thorns. But ignoring that he carried them down two flights of stairs. I will not walk down those stairs without using the hand rail, but both his hands were occupied. It still amazes me what Mexicans can do, especially when they are as big as Filipe.
I liked the openness without the bougainvillea and I did not have to put up with being stabbed by the awful thorns. Bougainvilleas have been planted everywhere by the Vallarta Garden Club and they even have a bougainvillea festival each year. Fine it you do not have to live with them. Then I thought I had made a mistake in my cheapness by using pots too small. As rapidly as they were growing I knew in time they would out grow the pots and I would have to water them daily. So with gritting teeth, I bought two new pots. When I originally planted them, I put sheep shit in the bottom, thinking that as the roots reach down, they would like the extra nourishment. ( If you want to know what "sheep shit" is scroll back six or seven months when I wrote a whole posting on it.) But the plants had not really established themselves and when I tried to move them to the new pots the soil fell away exposing the new tiny roots. Apparently I grabbed a gob of sheep shit and hurriedly packed it around one of the plants. It immediately wilted and is spite of daily watering, continued to die back. It was being burned up by the fertilizer.
Everything died except one tiny shoot. I knew in time it would recover and put out new shoots but I am impatient (one of my many faults, and besides, I do not have a lot of time left). So I decided to buy another one. Actually I wanted to buy two more so one would cover the railing and one would grow up to the wrought iron trellis between me and my neighbors balcony. In four years I have only seen them twice on the balcony, but I really like my privacy. I pay Filipe 300 pesos to drive me around to my errands (normally making at two or three stops). But I did not need anything expect the plant. It seemed ridiculous to spend 300 pesos to buy a 30 peso plant (yes, I know I am cheap). So I set off on the local bus (an experience that deserves it's own posting).
I prefer the PTL nursery. "PTL" is what we call Pitilal (a poor suburb of Vallarta) where most of the Mexicans live as it is much cheaper (No! I have no desire to live there). But I had no idea how to get there by bus and the Costco bus stops right in front of the other nursery. I explained what I was looking for and the girl led me to the area for vines. They do speak a little English here but I still do not like the place. The plants were horrible looking scrawny things eaten up by caterpillars. I found two that I thought I might be able to save, but as I was headed to the cash register I realized the not only was something crawling on my hands and arms, but something was biting me as well. I dropped the plants and screamed as I spotted hundreds of termite all over me and the plant.. They were eating the wood stake, but living in the soil. I had no idea termites bite (but they do chew wood). I guess they were mad and the bites hurt. Now, my skin is very old and my hands are riddled with blue veins and covered in liver spots. With all the sun they have turned into old leather, but I did not think they could be mistaken for wood!
The woman who runs the joint came running out from behind her desk and poured some fluid over the plants. I said, "No way, I do not want them and would certainly not take them into my home" She sent the girl scurrying for new ones. I really wanted to leave, but I was already there and she did bring out two plants that although sick looking had no termites. After carefully inspecting them, I handed her a 100 peso note. She looked at in and indicated that it would be sufficient (like she was doing me a favor) I said, "Hold on here, they are 30 pesos at the PTL nursery and for what I have been through they should be free." She let me have the two for 60 pesos and I headed out to flag down a taxi. I had brought two black garbage bags to carry them in, but could not handle them on a bus. As it happened a taxi pulled right up. I did notice the man was blind in one eye and the other one was reduced to a small slit. Still if he wasn't qualified they wouldn't let him drive. Right? Wrong! I have been told that most taxi drivers are ex cons as no one else will hire them. There is no test for taxi drivers here. HEY! IT'S MEXICO!
We had just pulled onto Highway 200 when the car sputtered and began moving in lurches. He changed to neutral and raced the motor. Back in gear it sputtered and lurched again. All the while he is patting the dash board saying "Mi chica" (which is girl friend in Mexico). He made several stops and then we were approaching the tunnel. I thought of getting out each time we stopped but my plants were locked in his trunk. . He pulled over just in front of the tunnel racing the motor and muttering "mi chica" I was terrified of it dying in the tunnel. Yes, I know any sane person would have leaped out and fled leaving the plants behind. (Well??). We slowly crept into the tunnel. If it stopped (which is illegal in the tunnel) it would cause a major crack up of cars. If I survived the crash, no taxi would stop to pick me up in the tunnel. I would have to crawl to the end hoping I was not sucked under a speeding truck by centrifugal force. The tunnel is scary to drive through let alone try to walk through. If I made to the other side carrying two garbage bags I would look like a bag lady (make that a bag man)
Some how we made it through and after the tunnel it is all down hill so he could coast most of the way. He asked for 80 pesos (it should have been 60) but I gave him 100 thinking he needed it more than I do and I was so happy to arrive home safely. I have planted them and trying to train it up the wall by using that fishing wire I use for everything. As you can see the older plant is thriving and has already passed one of the concrete pillars. The other three look as pitiful as they did when I brought them home. But I am hoping with a little care they will recover.
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